Pfft!

Alright kiddos, listen up as uncle Crackerjack enlightens you all to the real methods for pwning n00bz in a deathmatch server.

So, the first thing you need to do stand perfectly still in the highest traffic area of the map with an awp or an auto. Simply keep holding down the left mouse button at chest level until you get a kill. If you're feeling particularly skilled that day, try ducking into and out of cover using the biggest beeline strafe that you can manage. Preaiming and intelligently taking angles is for pussies, so make sure you do the most exaggerated peek possible before scanning for a target with your scope. Since you don't want to miss, make sure you also take about two to three seconds before firing. Once the enemy has stopped rushing you, it's time to plant yourself right out of spawn and shoot the easiest targets possible. Bonus points if you do all of this with in sneezing distance of five other awpers.

Not in the mood to snipe? Simply equip a p90 or para and hold down w and mouse 1 while running toward spawn. Make sure you take corners as tightly as possible and set your lerp to about 500 so that your bullets make it around the corner before you do. Bonus points if you aim so that the bullets keep at head level, negating any need to aim on your part.

Lastly, you should end your death match session by running around with a knife in spawn, slashing people from behind.

You get bonus points for doing all of this on an iceworld or aim map deathmatch server.