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Confessions of a Shitty
#1
On December 19th of last year, I stumbled upon War Lords. A quick Google search, I think something like "cs source pug servers" or something similar, presented me with the inactive (aside from the Announcer bots) War Lords Steam group on the first page of results. I added the servers to my favorites, and to my pleasant surprise, one was actually populated. I spectated and watched in awe as people played a competitive CSS match in late 2018. 

These servers were an important discovery for me. I recently moved to an extremely rural area on the east coast for work after graduating college in Houston. I went from standard, rapid home internet and playing AAA PC and console titles to fixed 4G LTE internet capped at 30GB/mo and playing Old School RuneScape and other games that don't take up too much data to run. Now, next month I'll have 200GB as I've found a better fixed internet plan, so at least that problem will be alleviated, but the speeds are still ridiculously slow, even for fixed internet. All that to say this- I can't play GO because of my internet, but it's good enough to play Source. I am a very competitive person, and I love the subtle nuances that make Counter-Strike the game we all thoroughly enjoy or beyond. "Finally," I thought after discovering War Lords, "a fun, competitive outlet for me to utilize and enjoy at home." I have about 675 hrs played of CS:GO from back in 2015-2016 when I was playing with friends from school. I had a great deal of fun, so I thought here I could somewhat recreate my experiences with GO from a few years prior.

I suck fucking cock compared to about 80-90% of the server. I quickly realized this back on day 1 when I got my first couple of matches in. In fact, the rest of the month didn't go well for me either. I felt like I was at the bottom of the barrel in here, and rightfully so. People were bitching at me, being condescending, and constantly reminding me they were unhappy to have me on their team. And for the most part, I was understanding of the players' disposition. Having a shitty on your team makes the game a 4v5 and can often hinder a team more so than simply not having anyone in the 5th slot. I took all of the criticism in, took a deep breath, and continued to play.

Despite my performance, there were actually a few individuals who were quite kind to me, though perhaps patient is a more appropriate word. Peter, for example, was never shy to give me constructive criticism, which I immediately encouraged. I remember a specific match on Mill where Peter gave me a tip, then said something like, "I'm not trying to be a dick, just trying to help you out." I was grateful for his attitude and his patience, and still am. More decent people began to help as well. They would tell me what to do for practice (DM was the most common response, which I was already doing fairly consistently), and ask me about my settings. If something needed to be tweaked, they would tell me. The biggest tweak happened on the 18th of this month when Delux helped me change my lerp from 100 to 31. I felt that my difference in shot and performance made the lerp, to me, the most important change that was made. I also downloaded an aim map and began to practice on that before playing pugs each day in January as well as hopping in DMs. I used to do the same thing in CS:GO and found it aided my improvement a ton.

In all of December, my W-L was 7-13, and my avg RWS was ~5.2. I was labeled a shitty, and I reckon I'll always be one to some people here no matter how well I perform. I really think I am improving, though, and I hope to not irritate the good regulars that play here for much longer. Things have turned around recently, though, and it's evident just by looking at my stats. In my last 25 games, my average RWS is 10.41, and my W-L is 18-7. I'm actually on a 7 match win streak right now. This doesn't mean that I don't suck anymore though; I still suck, and by no means do I think I'm good now just because I've doubled in RWS avg. It's not a huge sample size anyway, but I do feel its enough to at least point to signs of improvement, which I'm happy with so far.

In closing, I'm sorry if I've frustrated you with my poor play in the recent past. I can't promise you that I'll do any better in future games, but I can promise you this; I am desperately trying to improve. I am working every day in aim maps, DMs, watching old CSS pro matches, and of course, giving it my all in War Lords pugs. And moreover, I am LISTENING. I am carefully listening to any and all pointers given to me and I can't say enough how much I appreciate those who have chosen to help me improve with constructive criticism rather than completely shit on me.

I appreciate your time. Shitty Wilson, signing out.
[-] The following 4 users Like wil.son's post:
   QueenCrazy, roby, rookoo, ruby
#2
F00kin n00bies
#3
as long as ya give calls and try nobody can justifiably shit on u. sorry for raging at you though, ur a good team mate
[-] The following 1 user Likes rookoo's post:
   wil.son
#4
(Jan 24 2019, 02:37 PM)rookoo Wrote: as long as ya give calls and try nobody can justifiably shit on u. sorry for raging at you though, ur a good team mate

No need for sorries. Always down for trash talk whether its serious or joking. Far different from just telling me to fuck off. You’ve never been bitchy at me in Pugs and that’s really all I give a shit about.
#5
(Jan 24 2019, 02:37 PM)rookoo Wrote: as long as ya give calls and try nobody can justifiably shit on u. sorry for raging at you though, ur a good team mate

No need for sorries. Always down for trash talk whether its serious or joking. Far different from just telling me to fuck off. And like I said in the post, I understand the rage for the most part. You’ve never been bitchy at me in Pugs anyway, and that’s really all I give a shit about.
#6
(Jan 24 2019, 03:57 PM)wil.son Wrote:
(Jan 24 2019, 02:37 PM)rookoo Wrote: as long as ya give calls and try nobody can justifiably shit on u. sorry for raging at you though, ur a good team mate

No need for sorries. Always down for trash talk whether its serious or joking. Far different from just telling me to fuck off. And like I said in the post, I understand the rage for the most part. You’ve never been bitchy at me in Pugs anyway, and that’s really all I give a shit about.

I've been trying to get better at not raging at ppl who try. but reek still gets my dick down his throat
#7
Was a pretty good read, thank you for sharing this. Also glad to know that the toxicity didn't make you stop playing the game and good to know that you are trying to make yourself better at the game instead of letting it all get to you. Hope you continue to have fun playing Smile
Hi Big Grin
-QueenCrazy
#8
If you're a "shitty" who drops weapons, listens, and calls I don't think you'll take too much heat from most try hards. The awpers will appreciate the extra funding, the baiters will appreciate your scouting, and the rest will appreciate your calls (assuming they are accurate). If you're calling on behalf of silent no-mic individuals while dead then your teammates will appreciate that too. However, you should selectively call only when it will be beneficial and these calls need to be short and fast or you'll antagonize teammates listening for footsteps. The rest of the hate usually comes from a select few habitual ragers.

I'm usually only riled up by "shitties" who don't follow calls and/or use common sense, for example they may repeatedly take the scenic route when rotating (so they never make it in time) or outright camp the opposite site during calls to rotate and even after bomb is planted. These are the kind of "shitties" who earn bans.

Although, I can't really call people "shitties" since I'm borderline "shitty" myself. I've been using a vertical mouse lately, which is a 20-40% hit to aiming for at least a 20% hit to rws.  Tongue
[-] The following 3 users Like M. Bison's post:
   Ben-, CaliSnipe, _nme
Steam Wrote: 4:02 PM - George, of the jungle: was out
4:02 PM - George, of the jungle: bison, dude
4:02 PM - Brawl Bashin’ Bison: ???
4:02 PM - George, of the jungle: you're very rude towards alina
4:02 PM - George, of the jungle: how about unbanning her friend?
4:02 PM - George, of the jungle: I mean
4:02 PM - George, of the jungle: it's only gamebanana skins
4:02 PM - Brawl Bashin’ Bison: LOL
4:02 PM - George, of the jungle: ^^
4:02 PM - Brawl Bashin’ Bison: LOLOL
4:02 PM - George, of the jungle: lol
#9
(Jan 26 2019, 12:17 AM)M. Bison Wrote: If you're a "shitty" who drops weapons, listens, and calls I don't think you'll take too much heat from most try hards. The awpers will appreciate the extra funding, the baiters will appreciate your scouting, and the rest will appreciate your calls (assuming they are accurate). If you're calling on behalf of silent no-mic individuals while dead then your teammates will appreciate that too. However, you should selectively call only when it will be beneficial and these calls need to be short and fast or you'll antagonize teammates listening for footsteps. The rest of the hate usually comes from a select few habitual ragers.

I'm usually only riled up by "shitties" who don't follow calls and/or use common sense, for example they may repeatedly take the scenic route when rotating (so they never make it in time) or outright camp the opposite site during calls to rotate and even after bomb is planted. These are the kind of "shitties" who earn bans.

Although, I can't really call people "shitties" since I'm borderline "shitty" myself. I've been using a vertical mouse lately, which is a 20-40% hit to aiming for at least a 20% hit to rws.  Tongue

add to that = buy same time as team and dont bait 24/7 (even if you are good in the case of baiting).

and dont use troll weapons = 5-7, ump45, tmp, mac10, autosnipes, scouts, aug, krieg, m249, both shotguns, mp5 (outside for 2nd round).

have a good time on source new player Heart
[-] The following 1 user Likes Ben-'s post:
   CaliSnipe
#10
I'll be updating this thread with my progress as I play on wL and improve. Thanks Bison and Ben for the advice and words of encouragement. I promise I'm not just some disgruntled player who's salty about toxic players. They're in every gaming community ever and wL is no exception. Just gotta deal with them and move on.

As for gameplay, I've been steadily averaging between 8-9 rws per match. Today was a particularly good day. I played above average, but this could just be that I had Netex on my team for a couple of the matches. I got my first 1v5 clutch on these servers today as well! Pretty stoked on that. I think I could have played the 1v1 better but to get the 1v5 ace was a really solid milestone for me. I actually went to check the demo, and the round prior, Ze'yon and f0rw are in spec talking about how nice I am, but how poorly I play in-game. It was a nice feeling to hear and see everyone's reaction after the round in spec and on the opposite team, which may sound a bit narcissistic, but it simply felt good to do something really solid in-game in front of and against players that have called you bad in the recent past.

I can feel my gamesense improving. My prefires are getting more solid as well; it came in handy twice during my 1v5. Still have a long, long, LONG way to go.

RWS when I posted this - 6.33
RWS now - 7.16
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